Would You Buy Vegan Limericks From This Man?
by IsaChandra
SonOfSeitan aka Mike Desert aka Mike Sunburn was the clear winner of the limerick contest with such gems as:
There once was a vegan from Tempe
She loved to suck cork quite a plenty
With an Italian one night
Though try as she might
His erection was barely al dente.
And his softer limerickal side:
Our planet is all going to shit
A fact that few people admit
The cows burp and fart
Up pops a Wal*Mart
As I shine an apple off with my spit
But there was a total conflict of interest there because he was a Veganomicon tester. So he’s going to be getting his book early, plus another book later, but I have to pick a second winner. So after a couple of quick IMs with a few accomplished limerickcists I settled on sugarbeettree:
My date likes to fondle the fruit.
My asparagus thinks it?s quite cute.
But when en route
to a steamy en cro?te
beware the covert ginger root.
I’m not sure what it actually means. But I think what we’ve learned from all this is that either vegans suck at limericks or maybe everyone sucks at limericks or maybe limericks just suck.
Thanks everyone for playing! Sugarbeet, send me your address!
The next contest will probably be over the weekend and definitely will not involve rhyming.
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